Brain Bulletin 131 - Thank you Mrs. McLean

 

 

“The truth is - no matter how “self-made” you think you are, you are really made by many who have invested in your life. Be known as a thankful and grateful person. Be known as the person that is investing in others to build them up. It’s your way of paying back the debt that others have invested in you.” ― Josh Hatche

 

This is where my formal education, and love of learning, began many years ago in a one room school house in Esperanza, B.C., Canada. Esperanza was a village of 50 people hugging the northwest coast of Vancouver Island in Canada. No roads. Only access was boat, or seaplane.

 

Mrs. McLean taught grades one to eight, all in the same room. I was the only student in Grade One. I used to like to tell people that I was always "top of my class". My brother would pipe up and say, "Also the bottom." True.

Mrs. McLean was the best storyteller ever. I loved finishing up my work quickly, so I could listen to the history lessons that she gave the older children. She always knew I was eavesdropping, but never let on. I think about her often.

Albert Schweitzer once said, “I look back upon my youth and realize how so many people gave me help, understanding, courage – very important things to me – and they never knew it. They entered into my life and became powers within me. All of us live spiritually by what others have given us, often unwittingly, in the significant hours of our life. At the time these significant hours may not even be perceived. We may not recognize them until years later when we look back, as one remembers some long-ago music or a childhood landscape. We all owe to others much of the gentleness and wisdom that we have made our own; and we may well ask ourselves what will others owe to us?”

 

I read this¹ recently:

"You may be able to pinpoint some situations in which you’ve learnt specific skills or people who’ve taught things to you but generally it’s dependent on the subtle, ongoing observations and imitations that we are constantly making in response to others.

This is a form of role-modelling and is often the only way we learn the nuances and complexity of human behaviour and emotion. In the same way we need to watch someone serve in tennis – it’s nearly impossible to do it correctly without having seen it rather than just following instructions – people have to see the social and emotional aspects of learning role-modelled in order to understand and adopt them.

And it’s these little imitations that add up to habits and lasting behaviours that become part of who we are, altering our characteristics, beliefs and nudging our values without us even realising. You, me, all of us are often completely unaware of the strongest influence in our life – the behaviour of those around us."

 

These people give of themselves. It's intentional, and it rarely happens by accident.

 

When I give my presentations and workshops on leadership and the brain , early on I ask participants to identify someone from any point in their lives who had a huge, positive impact on their life trajectory. It could be a boss, teacher, family member, friend, neighbour, coach, anyone. Then I ask them to write down a few reasons why: How did these people treat them? How did they speak? What did they say? Who were they when you were watching, and they didn't know it? Then we have a time of sharing, and together build a powerful experience. I am always a bit caught off guard at the emotion that fills the room. People matter. This new year let's continue to act like what we do matters. Because it does.

Thank you Mrs. McLean.
You've always been one of my heroes.

 

Here's a bit more on this (and the video here is inspiring) :