Brain Bulletin 125 - Four Magical Words to Use Often
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Brain Bulletin Brain Bulletin 125 - Four Magical Words to Use Often
If this seems simple, it is.
Four small words, used authentically, can make a powerful difference in your life, and in the lives of those around you. The 4 words? > "Can you help me?"
Here's why:
"In helping others, we help ourselves, for whatever good we give out completes the circle and comes back to us." ~ Flora Edwards
For example, in about 30 minutes I can go upstairs and say, "I've finished Brain Bulletin 125. Can you take a minute and tweak it for me?" Adding qualifiers and enhancers can signal my importance and protects my ego. Stated differently, "I just need a little bit of help. The heavy lifting is done." Truthfully, I haven't really asked, I've stated.
Here's a better way: A humble, "Can you help me?". Followed by silence.
I travel often for work. Not long ago I was in a hotel, and to say the "neighbours" were noisy would be an understatement. They were a happy group! I really needed a good night's sleep. I had a 7 hour leadership workshop to facilitate starting at 800 a.m.! I did not pick up the phone. I went down to the front desk and asked the person, "Can you help me?".
What a difference when we speak to someone's natural, instinctive desire to help others. We have signaled respect. We have given them a gift. The person at the hotel desk looked a bit surprised, then pleased, and said, "Sure, if I can ....". Me, "I have to speak all day tomorrow, and my room is noisy. I was hoping for a good sleep". (I don't tell the person how to help me.)
Four magic words stated as three, "I trust you.". I got a new room, upgraded to the top floor. (And a good sleep.)
So, I can go upstairs in 20 minutes and say, "Can you help me?'
Then I can say, "My Brain Bulletin is a mess, and I need to get it out this morning. You're better with people than me." (Which by-the-way she is.)
Respect and trust go a long way. We might get the help we need. And, the other person gains a sense of pride and satisfaction.
Then, we get to say the two magical words, "Thank you." And, really mean it.
Here's a bit more on noticing others :
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